Spiritual Forum - Societies views on sex have poisoned me, PLEASE help . . .

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Societies views on sex have poisoned me, PLEASE help . . .

(24 posts)

Started 1 year ago by BroDan
Latest reply from abstractprophet

BroDan
Member

Hi guys, hard days here . . .

I have now understood that the desire of sex is merely the want to experience both 'timelessness' and 'ego-lessness', that this is the very reason we all we crave sex, that during the peak of sex is the on time many of us humans get to experience our true selves, that we crave for this rush, to sense who we are.

That I have studied so much to arrive at this, I simply searched for reasons why I desired to find 'my true love'. or my so called 'twin flame'.

Now single, strong, athletic, good looking, young, positive and with a whole life of incredible achievements and skills I desire to share with 'the one' I feel is a total trick of the ego.

That the answer is that it is all an illusion, that we simply seek another to make love to, to experience 'super counsciousness'.

So tell me, how on earth am I to even want to share so intimately with another when I realise it is merely an act of desire to reach higher planes???

Do I choose a life of drugs???

Or maybe walk endlessly alone convincing my self of how beautiful the sun set is???

Or just end it all now???

Knowledge is mightier than the sword.

Then such deep knowledge leaves you unable to connect with those who claim to love you.

So you act, you deny who you are to keep the peace, at which state, you deny your self and disappear.

You dare come back to face nothing but deep disagreements.

So what now, act for the rest of your life denying who you are or argue with those you love???

This is the darkest corner my ego has ever lead me to.

Please, please, please . . .

teach me, or give me insight to what I should be letting go of to set my self free of my ego's torment or find again to live in that childhood state where we all shared the ability to just let go and be.

I'm sad, very, very sad.

Please help me guys.

Dan

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Posted 1 year ago #
Ekanta
Member

All joy is of same substance, just variations of it.
All your thoughts are illusions, and as long as they are there... they will bug you.
No one needs to teach you, your conscience is your teacher, use that. Try it a day and you will quickly find that you get peace and harmony. This is the ultimate faith, the ultimate guru, the ultimate teaching, the ultimate self confidence. Nothing else is ever necessary... no rules, no goal, no denial, no worries, its here and now, the complete way. Just DO IT.
Dont follow the body, dont follow the mind - it will feed your worries and illusions.
Follow your conscience - it will guide you and starve out your worries and illusions.

Peace!

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

Sex is energy....a way of blowing off negative energy to find your center again.
There are some individuals who can live without it; I know a few. For most, it is
necessity... As far as abstinence, perhaps you are not ready. Your energy might be
extremely intense; you simply are not ready. There is nothing wrong with you except
trying to be something you are not, right now.
Society is not running you Bro. Society is simply where you are. You choose from
the great variety, those beliefs that you WANT to incorporate into your thinking.
We are all dealing with energy..think a thought and push energy outward, move with
energy, flowing with energy, learning to handle that energy that runs through us.
When we are young that energy is strong; we are of spawning age and children are
possible. That intensity of energy drives us into mating rituals necessary to human reproduction. It is possible to be a saint and be married; many have done so.
This is your statement: And this is who you think you are. Now single, strong, athletic, good looking, young, positive and with a whole life of incredible achievements and skills I desire to share with 'the one'.

Posted 1 year ago #
shin
Member

{ Hi guys, hard days here . . . }

At least no physical problems then. LOL

{ I desire to share with 'the one' I feel is a total trick of the ego }

Maybe. What could you achieve with 'the one' in terms of 'super counsciousness' which you could not achieve with 'the many'?
Actually, what is experienced during orgams is body-consciousness with mental functions disabled.
Ego is a mental function, that why it is gone for a short while.
'The one' and 'soul-mate' etc, are also mental functions.

This should be enough to tell you what you should let go of.

Posted 1 year ago #
BroDan
Member

Brilliant, thanks guys, though it takes me time to post back I read your post the very next day I see them, then ponder for a week or so before I write back.

I am covering ground, learning a lot and evolving at a painful rate only to find my self deeper in confusion, this confusion has now being going on turbulently in my for months.

Here's a question for you guys:

Do I go for loving one person, let an intimate relationship as such evolve and satisfy my ego while at the same time knowing what ever it is I feel for the one I am in an intimate relationship with is temporary?

Or do I just avoid relationships all together, put up with this illusionary pain and try my best to enjoy life till I master unconditional love for all, this being the destination I am to arrive at any way through a some what seemingly useless relationship?

It's these very questions above I'm finding it hard to detach from.

What do you feel my wise friends?

Thanks

Dan

x

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

If you are asking yourself should you get into a deep relationship???? Maybe not
right.. I once asked a wise person when I was young, How would I know when I met
the right person?" and the answer was "You will fall like a ton of bricks. You
will know...You will not have to ask.." When the time came, it was true...every inch
of my being had not one doubt, not one negative thought... I KNEW.
Now second part. That relationship lasted 20 years. It was not a lifetime...but
for the time it was, it was good, and the time of family.
The next relationship...even more tonnage...but necessary to my time in this life, and for which I am very grateful...and that one was and still is...very tender and
full of terrific memories ...even tho it is over...deeply spiritual and awakening.
No relationship is permanent; all are temporary...even tho they last a
lifetime...You learn what you needed to learn in the relationship...share what you
needed to share and move on..but never go into a relationship with the forethought
of this is only temporary...it'll break you up...and gnaw at the insides.

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

Each relationship has a little bit to share with you...and each is different and
unique all by itself....even the negative ones through which you learn the most. I
just parted from a temporary relationship yesterday and yes, it hurts. All along
I knew it was temporary...but I was hoping...
Knowing that I am growing in spite of the pain, makes it bearable. I shall survive.
And abundantly well...

Posted 1 year ago #
BroDan
Member

Ah thanks Starzz,

You see, you say things as you've found them, only from your view and I've never experienced what you speak but only on a physical level.

For some one like me who's now spent so much time reading about the final destination, this being a life free of sex I find it hard to imagine that I'd meet some one I'd truly want to be intimate with again, it almost doesn't feel right though I my ego very much yearns it.

I'm starting to understand that there's a much happier way to be, to master Godliness, this being a state where you are free of lust so are actually able to love. I've also leaned that the reason why we want to make love is because at the peak of love making we experience two things, these being egolessness and timelessness. This state feels like total bliss because what happens at this point is that we get a chance to view of our true selves, to totally pause between thought, rest in the bliss, in the 'one'.

I'm guessing you've already worked out I've been reading Osho's writings? Well he goes on to say that once we have had a glimpse of our true selves beyond the ego that our life's automatically start to take a much greater interest in moving towards living this state of bliss permanently rather than in one where we lust all the time.

As Osho says the way to achieve this is in two ways, through meditation (Which is very, very hard when you haven't regularly meditated from a young age) or through sex.

I feel like I'm trying to run before I can walk but I can't help but face my self in the direction I feel would make me most happy how ever self tormenting it may be now. How ever I've learned that what ever you push away your ego amplifies the 'want' for so am being careful to remain as open as possible to either just trying to get my focus back and love of work while I live this single life and be aware to allow who ever it is I may fall in love with in to my life when or if they appear.

I've reached a stage now where I don't have one single person I am in conflict with, I have spent month building all the crumbled bridges to the point that I'm now very much a peace with every one I know so what's happened is that I'm feeling 'in love', like I see I have equal love for every one weather I know them or not so to love 'one' other seems ridiculous and almost impossible now.

To be honest I can't sit still, I have this never ending heart ache and can not for the life of me work out what it's caused by, it's either that I want to be loved, love or I'm simply resting in the abyss that is me as I heal, I just don't know but am very lost and wanting to do nothing but party, dance and drink beer on week ends, nothing else in my life makes sense to me right now, I've even lost all my passion to create. Part of me feels it would all pan out if I found my next love but that doesn't seem right either.

I feel I need to master a happy, solid state before I move in to a relationship but this of course we all know you have no choice over when of it it will ever happen.

Maybe I'm supposed to be single and serve the higher forces of God? I do this every day unconditionally any how and it's what I do that brings me closest to being happy.

Till then, when ever or what ever it is to appear, as I write, I rest in this deep, deep heart ache.

Have you any idea what it might be Sarzz?

Thanks for your time.

Dan

x

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

Maybe it's time to say...God, I'm not doing this good all by myself. I'm
going to drop all this stuff and let you pick for me...cause maybe, just
maybe you've got a better answer and will send it my way.
Meanwhile I'll be busy making a better person of myself so when love
comes, I'll be ready.
For me, Every time love has come, it came when I wasn't expecting it, wanting it, or
trying to make it happen...and then it overwhelmed me completely... the recent
event of which I spoke above was when I was trying to make it happen....and that...
that never works. So now it is time to just get out there...after asking and be busy...
and trust the universe....

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

"as I heal, I just don't know but am very lost and wanting to do nothing but party, dance and drink beer on week ends, nothing else in my life makes sense to me right now, I've even lost all my passion to create. Part of me feels it would all pan out if I found my next love but that doesn't seem right either."
STOP TEARING YOURSELF APART...!!!!!

Does that seem right to you? The kind of lady you are looking for does none of those
things; that is a dead end... You are stating you are nothing without love; absolutely
nothing...(also confusing!).... and very untrue.
Take all of that energy and get back to creating....throw yourself into your work
with intensity of pride and joy....and perhaps some lady seeing your work will say
"Just the kind of man I am looking for..."
If you are a writer of songs....you could, with your intensity, at this time, put
together some very moving material...

Posted 1 year ago #
BroDan
Member

Thanks Starzz !

In last 24 hrs I seem to be breaking out of this nightmare at last. I've realised I've been chasing an illusive desire, like man in a desert chasing an oasis for water, it's just a mirage.

I was looking for some one to smooth over this heart ache I've had for months realising it has nothing to do with exterior fulfilment, it's down to me to fix my self first, then I might meet that girl. Till then I was or still am in a state of need, I can really see that need is a negative force placed up on ones self that then either attracts others in the same needy frame of mind so end up in conflict with each other as neither can satisfy the others need or repel those very people who would be well suited for friendship or more.

I have a very different out look to you Starzz, there is no way I would 'force' my self to create, if I feel it was relasing the depression I've felt then would have done so, yes I know what you mean about the kind of art you can produce when in a depression but it's just not the way I treat my self, I've learned to be as gentle and loving on my self as possible. Any implied force is the opposite to 'allowing' one's self to clear and evolve. Saying this I do have work to do or my career will totally dissolve as well so here I am writing a big proposal !

I can see my creativity will slowly come back to me now and things are starting to pan out (I hope).

As we know, we only have to be self aware of what we face, see it, look it and then it just dissolves, I'm now enjoying watching the nightmare I was in dissolve at last, I hope this again isn't just another illusion.

Thanks guys and thanks Starszz

xxx

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

Breathe, just breathe.....

Posted 1 year ago #
abstractprophet
Member

I have suffered sadness, from which I learnt to be sad.

Was it in learning to be sad that I also learnt to be happy?

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

Can't recognize one without its opposite!!!!!!

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

Sometimes a jolt is required to move one from one position to
another more rewarding position where you wouldn't have gone
until you'd been prodded. Life prods you out of complacency...
No one lives without a few enlightening experiences.
As a friend of mine once said...If you aren't constantly learning
and growing, events will force you to do so...

Posted 1 year ago #
abstractprophet
Member

Mooooo

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

Mooooooooo???????????

Posted 1 year ago #
abstractprophet
Member

Your prodding call made me feel very much like a calf being set along the labarynth as I tried to chew a hole in the wall. :o)

Posted 1 year ago #
starzz
Member

I am laughing so hard I almost fell out of the chair............

Posted 1 year ago #
abstractprophet
Member

There is no escape eh starzz. How funny. haha

Posted 12 months ago #
BroDan
Member

Ha Ha !

Lovely to read the banter between you guys, funny, my post in another threads very connected to this.

I feel the universe just loves. This 'Loving' we receive can be taken any one wishes but it's all very truthful, truth being Love.

BANG !!! Here's the next surprise just as you get comfortable !! Ha Ha !

Posted 11 months ago #
abstractprophet
Member

What makes you say the universe JUST loves?

Posted 11 months ago #
BroDan
Member

Well you tell me, what else does the Universe actually do??

There is no sense that the universe does anything which is actually evil so it seems obvious to me, the universe just loves.

xxx

Posted 11 months ago #
abstractprophet
Member

What does the universes even do at all?? Sure scientists will tell you it does this and this, mystics and sages will tell you this and this. Who should I BELIEVE though?

In saying that I like the idea of Love within the universe as it promotes the idea of the "Gift of Life". Yet how can I be certain that Love is exactly what It Is? How can I be certain that Love exists beyond the gift of love itself?

Maybe we should try and define exactly what Love is, and exactly what evil is before moving forward. What do you think? Anyone?

Much Love

Posted 11 months ago #

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